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THE GUITARIST

Oh meri Munni...

June 1983, Allapuzha District, Kerala.


Rain never stops at Allepy. So is the endless ruffle between Arshad and Munni.
Munni the most studious girl of class IV was the star of the school. Everyone was her friend there except for two… Arshad and Sheila. For Arshad, Sheila was his very good companion who always supports and stands by him. But Sheila thought she was all for Arshad. Sheila was Arshad’s body guard, neighbor, classmate, friend, sister, guide...
Arshad and Munni admired each other, but they were never friendly. Sheila always stared fiercely at Munni so that Munni doesn’t near Arshad. There was this element of Ego always running high between Arshad and Munni. Munni always topped the class in all subjects. Name any competition and you can name the winner too. It was always Munni shinning bright. Arshad was quick, too quick in dismissing any discussion about subjects and competitions at school. Not that he dint like them, but he will have to praise and listen to others praise Munni for her show. But there was one area where Arshad topped. Poetry. He is almost unstoppable and spontaneous ever when it comes to quoting small poems. Be it in a crowd or alone to himself, he was proud to expel his rhyming verses.He had a fan club for his poetry including teachers and not to mention… Munni.

Both Arshad and Munni wanted to befriend each other. But nature’s decree or their persistence, they never allowed themselves be good. All went fine until this class tour was planned. Class IV students were taken to the town museum. Arshad had brought sweet candies to have on the way in bus from his dad’s shop. Munni had brought Rasna, the most famous beverage there, for her friends. Her mom had prepared Rasna in three bottles for Munni and her friends. Arshad too had enough candies for the entire class. Sheila had brought nice fried chicken, supplement for lunch which was just enough for her and Arshad. The class enjoyed the day. All had nice fun at the museum. Munni’s Rasna and Arshad’s candies kept them jumping all the day. At the end of the day, when everyone went home, there was so much fun and happiness in the air. But Arshad and Munni left home with heavy hearts. Arshad could hardly get a sip of Rasna as Munni’s friends had already emptied it by the time the bottle reached Arshad. Still he had the last sip without showing much interest about having it. Munni had dropped Arshad’s candy in mud, and she never asked for another. Arshad felt that she had done it purposefully. So there was another reason for them to turn faces against each other. But this time the disappointment was big. Especially, Arshad felt insulted. So was Sheila. From then on, Arshad and Munni never spoke with each other, never smiled too which they usually do. Any muffle between them, hardly lasted for a day. This time, already a week had passed, still they were at opposite ends.

Every Sunday evening, the students met at school to offer special prayers. That Sunday evening after the prayer meeting, Arshad and Sheila were returning home on their cycles. Munni was walking down slowly with her friend. Seeing Munni and her friend, Arshad stepped up his speed so as to move across Munni as soon as possible. Sheila too came up to his pace. Munni turned around and saw Arshad approaching her at a high speed. She waved her hands asking him to stop. Her gesture was like she wanted to inform about something. But Arshad moved away from his path avoiding Munni. But Sheila had to stop. She slowed down and stopped near Munni and her friend. Sheila was very uncomfortable talking to Munni, as she feared Arshad won’t like her talking to Munni. That was a quick conversation between Munni and Sheila. Arshad was waiting few steps ahead for Sheila. Arshad saw Sheila saying bye to Munni. Immediately he started to move. Poor Sheila had to hurry up to catch up with him. Arshad never opened his mouth; still Sheila briefed him the conversation between her and Munni. She said that it was Munni’s birthday tomorrow. And that she won’t be coming to school tomorrow. She had stopped them to invite Arshad and Sheila to her house for her Birthday cake cutting on Monday evening. Arshad nodded back disinterested. By this time Sheila’s house had come. Arshad waved bye to her and headed towards his house which was few streets away from there. Arshad had just entered the narrow lane near his house, where he was stopped forcefully. Munni stood on the way leaving no place for Arshad to proceed. Arshad gave a blank look at Munni, gesturing her to move away. Munni looked very disappointed. More disappointed and sad than angry. She gave a heavy blow on Arshad’s cycle and quietly left the place. Arshad stood clueless. He never expected her there. He thought may be she will call him to her house for her birthday. But Munni did nothing but for the bang on the wheel. Adding more to his confusion was her reaction. Disappointed eyes and the angry move by Munni, made Arshad scratch his head…

Silly little Kids :-)

she said to me...

Hey you,
Don't you give up, it's not so bad
There's still a chance for us
Hey you,
Just be yourself, don't be so shy
There's reasons why it's hard

Keep it together, you'll make it alright
Our celebration is going on tonight
Poets and prophets would envy what we do
This could be good, hey you

Hey you,
Open your heart, it's not so strange
You've got to change this time
Hey you,
Remember this, none of it's real
Including the way you feel

Keep it together, we'll make it alright
Our celebration is going on tonight
Poets and prophets Would envy what we do
This could be good, hey you

Hey you, save yourself
Don't rely on anyone else

First love yourself, then you can love someone else
If you can change someone else, then you have saved someone else
But you must first love yourself, then you can love someone else
If you can change someone else, then you have saved someone else
But you must first

Hey you,
There on the fence, you've got a choice
One day it will make sense
Hey you,
First love yourself, or if you can't,
Try to love someone else

Keep it together, we'll make it alright
Our celebration is going on tonight
Poets and prophets will envy what we do
This could be good, hey you

First love yourself, then you can love someone else
If you can change someone else, then you have saved someone else
But you must first love yourself, then you can love someone else
If you can change someone else, then you have saved someone else
But you must first

The Resurgence

Staring up into the heavens

In this hell that binds your hands

Will you sacrifice your comfort?

Make your way in a foreign land?

Wrestle with your darkness

Angels call your name

Can you hear what they're saying?

Will you ever be the same?

Remember, remember, never forget

All of your life has all been a test

You will find a gate that's open

Even though your spirit's broken

Open up my heart

And cause my lips to speak

Bring the heaven and the stars

Down to Earth for me

Wrestle with your darkness
Angels call your name
Can you hear what they're saying?
Will you ever be the same?

Frozen Thoughts

You only see what your eyes want to see
How can life be what you want it to be
You're frozen when your heart's not open
You're so consumed with how much you get
You waste your time with hate and regret

You're frozen when your heart's not open

If I could melt your heart

we’d never be apart

Give yourself to me

you are the key
Now there's no point in placing the blame

And you should know I'd suffer the same

If I lose you, my heart would be broken

Love is a bird, she needs to fly
Let all the hurt inside you die
You're frozen when your heart's not open

Extracts from Madonna's song Album..

நீ

அழகான நேரம் அதை நீ தான் கொடுத்தாய்

அழியாத சோகம் அதையும் நீ தான் கொடுத்தாய்

கண் தூங்கும் நேரம் பார்த்து கடவுள் வந்து போனதுபோல்

என் வாழ்வில் வந்தாய் நீ

ஏமாற்றம் தாங்கவில்லை

Im Depressed

Have you ever gone through this phase of emptiness? Where nothing is working and nothing is fulfilling? When you look around and you realize that this single truth about your life eclipses all other satisfying moments? When you find yourself alone with no one to lean on even when you are with a huge loving crowd ? Is this depression or beyond it?

We say we have friends, but where are they? Each is leading his/her life in another part of the world; even if physically close, it is thousands of light mental years apart. You want to reach out to rant without being judged and what do you get? A preach!

I am depressed and probably not making much sense; I am sleep deprived and I wish to be sedated; when I do wake up, I hope it would be to a different world and a different me!